rebirth

I'm not a big fan of first days. I enjoy the anticipation more, I guess.

The people are quite an interesting bunch. It's a fairly new team, most of them being there only 3-4 months on average. So we're all doing our own thing and trying to feel our way through. Top management seems to be very candid and encouraging, which I'm taking as a good sign. On our first team meeting, my responsibilities were mentioned 80% of the time! Talk about pressure. But with God's grace I know I'll get through.

I was watching Tyra earlier, and it was disturbing to see 15-year-olds taking fertility pills because they desperately want to have kids! And couple that with their persistence to get married, they say they're "ready". At FIFTEEN?! How can you even feed your kid?! And settling down, do you know what that means? Oh what a troubled world.

It was Alea's birthday bash last night, and we had a grand time. It's always so refreshing to be with the unicorns! My favorite Jose was there too, such fun! And then the nasty headache and intestinal unrest followed this morning, not fun at all. Planned to prepare for my trip next weekend, but my lethargic self just wouldn't budge.

==
"You make me laugh
You make me cry
I don't know which side to buy."
- 7 Things, Miley Cyrus

among other things

Really not used to not being busy. I enjoy sleeping in but then I realize it's noon and I just wasted the whole morning in bed. I've watched too much of House and his strange cases, and had to stop when it was getting too gross to handle. Was able to catch up on my reading, which is good, and also had the chance to push through with the long postponed breakfast/dinner dates with good friends. Met up with one of them over drinks last night, mainly to mull over her recent breakup. In the middle of all the rationalizing, someone came up, armed with one of the worst pick up lines ever -- "Hey, can I recruit you?" Hahaha. How apt. I know all about recruiting, crazy. Nice try.

On a whole, I'm glad I chose to take this break, gave me a lot of time to think these past few days. Sleep's been good yes, but the dreams weren't very slumber friendly. The things I've been thinking about create a life of their own when I try to get some shut-eye, and I don't know if that's a good thing. All boils down to faith, believing. Looking forward to an exciting day tomorrow.

==
"I guess that's what I get for wishful thinking."
- Rehab, Rihanna

backseat

The past few days have been filled with a flurry of emotions. I was (and still am) overwhelmed, excited, anxious, giddy, annoyed, dumbfounded. I had my last pod-eoke with Karen earlier today, and we were singing along to our usual favorites, in between mulling over our usual point of conversation. She says I'm hopelessly addicted. Haha. Fine fine, I agree. And I also realized that I will never settle for the backseat. NEVER.

Tomorrow's FIN for me!

==
"Nauubos na ang oras sa kahihintay."
- Torpe, Barbie Almalbis

giddy

I started sorting out my things at work today. Deposited a huge pile in the shredder, removed my ladybug push pins from the cork for safekeeping, took down all the photos plastered on my wall. Even though freedom is still 2 days away, I just feel so excited for this new step. It feels liberating yet challenging at the same time. Can't wait!

Another thing that's keeping me on my feet is the HK trip that's happening in less than 3 weeks! Now that I am tremendously excited for!

Had a very interesting chat with Denise today, was finally able to spill the beans. Haha. Thanks for listening (and virtually laughing at me) Denise. Always hope for the best. Carpe Diem indeed.

==
"All things are gonna happen naturally."
- You and I Both, Jason Mraz

what is your fruit?

This was a very interesting question posed during the homily earlier today. Quite timely too, considering the events that have transpired in the last few weeks. I just quit my job, and am moving to what I truly believe is something better, something that will help me get to where I want to be. It's about time that I get out of my comfort zone, and actually DO something to fuel my dreams. I'm tired of ranting, complaining, and just sulking in the four corners of my submarine office. Yes, I am very grateful for the extensive training I earned, but there's always that point when you just have to grow up and explore the rest of the world. This new opportunity will definitely be more challenging - mentally and geographically - but then again, comfort will not get me anywhere. I need to take these steps, there's no turning back.

I've always wondered why I was brought to this field, it's not even directly related to my degree. I never thought I'd end up here, but as time passed, I've come to accept that maybe I was sent here for a higher cause. I do take pride in providing jobs for other people, I feel fulfillment when I'm able to contribute in making someone's future a tad bit brighter. I wasn't very sure about my profession when I was just starting out, but now I'm all smiles when people ask me what I do. Maybe this really is my vocation, this is my fruit.

==

"Learn to wait with expectancy. Get up every morning and water your seeds by thanking God that the answer is on the way. Then take it one step further and start making preparations for the dreams God has planted in your heart. Talk like it's going to happen, act like it's going to happen. Keep the right attitude. If you will go from believing to expecting, God promises that in due season, at the right time, He will bring you the desires of your heart."