action?

I just came across one of my posts a few months back, and there I said I was missing the action. Now that I am immersed in more action than I can handle, I so badly want to be transported back to the simpler times.

Just goes to show we are never satisfied. Ho hum. :)

you have to live with it

Things happen simultaneously. You work, you step back and take a break, you enjoy what you do, you get frustrated with your boss, you are stricken by panic attacks, you get offended, you unknowingly offend, you cry, you laugh, you are full of conflicting emotions.

And what do you do about it? You address the most dominant feeling, the uncontainable optimism, or the throbbing pain that hits you right smack where you topple over and lose your balance.

There are things in life you can control, things you can always do something about. Sometimes you choose to act on them, other times you just passively accept them as they are. And then there are those things that are just thrown on you, and you just have to swim through them gracefully or otherwise. Bottomline is, how you react to whatever's happening can make or break you.

Everyday I feel different about where I stand. On good days I see things progressing and me moving closer to all my aspirations and goals. On bad days I'm stuck in a rut, trying to crawl my way out with badly scraped knees.

But still, at the end of the day, there are always reasons as to why things are how they are. The tricky part is having the patience and the wisdom to understand and fit the pieces together. It's all about mindset.

==
"Between the lines of fear and blame, and you begin to wonder why you came."
- How To Save A Life, The Fray

off to fly

Keeping me up on my toes:

1. My own place come February.
2. Thailand with the girls! :)
3. Bohol with Santayo after Jiggy's grad.
4. Whole fam spending Christmas 2007 with Mama.
5. My own Blue List line up: Italy, Spain, Greece, and my beloved Aussie.

Believe me, I'm going places. ;p

==
"Spend the afternoon. You can't take it with you."
- Annie Dillard

thinking and rethinking

Had our regular BOT at Kubo earlier, and boy was I shaken. I thought I had everything (well, almost everything) in place, but then again, we always learn something new everyday. Work will stay as it is. Dealing with controversy and politics will really test your principles, your values, it will even help you define who you really are. Hay.

Can't elaborate now, have to hit the sack if it means hitting the alarm button at 6 am (my new commitment to myself.) Looking forward to Conti's tomorrow! :)

==
"Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass, and when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired, we are scared. Denying it doesn't change the truth. Sooner or later, we have to put aside our denial, and face the world."
- Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

changing the lights

It's a Monday, the most crucial day of work, and I missed out on it. Physically (and mentally!) I just felt that I was on the verge of breaking down. Just a day's rest would hopefully cure everything and make me the proactive me that I want to be. If only it were that easy!

I visited my favorite adoration chapel today and again felt the glimmer of hope that is unique to that place. It's amazing how I always feel a lot lighter upon stepping out of its doors, taking home with me the promise of better things to come.

Coming in to my 2nd month of work, dealing with all this hoopla only means that I should strike a balance between the current situation at work, and my goals in life. What do I really want to do, and how will this help me get there? It sounds so idealistic, but really if I wanna survive in this jungle, I might as well play my cards right. I'll just do my work, avoid the negativity, and eventually I'll take on my Blue List. :) it's weird that I sound so positive, but hey, I have to start somewhere. Oh yeah, and I need to see my friends more often. :)

==
"Pain comes in all forms. The small twinge, a bit of soreness, the random pain, the normal pains we live with everyday. Then there's the kind of pain we can't ignore. A level of pain so great that it blocks everything else, makes the rest of the world fade away, until all we can think about is how much we hurt. How we manage our pain is up to us."
- Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy

free fall

It's 2:30 AM and I'm still up. I missed this life - bloghopping, ym-ing, multiply-ing... Damn. Thank God I've got internet again. :)

This week has been more eventful than the rest, and I'm sure it'll be a supreme rollercoaster in the coming weeks. Thank God for my friends who haven't deserted me despite my negativity (or angst, as Ara would say), for BOT moments that make me forget about things even for a few hours tops, for God who's always been the prime mover of everything! There's always a reason. Hay.

Hope I can see my friends more often, work work work work work will really kill me sooner than I expect.

==
"No matter how hard you fight it, you fall, and it's scary as hell. Except, there's an upside to falling, it's the chance you give your friends to catch you."
- Meredith Grey, Grey's Anatomy